Yes, a sudden minor shock attacked me from every angle. On my first day with the company, I tried not to come with expectations as the feeling could be dejected if those ain't met. But what worries me is, I have yet to pass the first hurdle which is to bond with my colleagues. I have to admit, I'm pretty reserved with people I barely know and its' always like this at the beginning. I guess, its' the feeling that brought me away from the people and yes, the feeling is ridiculously negative. There comes a feeling for not be able to do things, for not be able to communicate well, for not be able to deliver the right ones and the list goes. Haha. Im so queen of the drama queens of being a new-hire.
Ive been through the same when I was in university. Being a leader and a new-hire is pretty much the same. It is always challenging. Negative feelings attacked me from different angles and it can even stopped me from doing things. The key of the solution is always ASK because obviously negative ones will get me carried away to only my world.
"After climbing a great hill, one only finds that there are many more hills to climb" Very true! When I believe I am competent enough to be in the industry, I started to see the whole new world differs greatly from what I had in my previous. In this corporate industry, self awareness is an endless topic and could be very subjective. Sometimes what in our mind and how we articulate things differs greatly. Even an honest compliment from us can sometimes be perceived by others as wanting something. RESPECT should always be the main pillar for everything. Respect for the people and the knowledge they have. Respect for the personality they carry and the goal they pursue. And more importantly, respect for whoever they are - superior, colleagues, subordinate, cleaner, tea lady and to all creatures deserved - again for whoever they are and InshaAllah, these will eliminate the negative thoughts and perceptions from the inside. To be respected is everyone's right. When we have a sense of respect, the whole universe will celebrate us :) Pramoedya says, “Berterimakasihlah pada segala yang memberi kehidupan.”- Bumi Manusia My superior from my previous company (internship) dropped a message said, "It's always hard in the beginning, I went through the same phase as well. I know you're a fighter & you'll do just fine InsyaAllah." | |
Ah, all these mixed feelings. I always forgot the important lesson in life where the hardest part for a human is to understand the changed life. To learn how to struggle with the old and the new is the real challenge! Learning is ongoing process, lets not give up when we fail, but to continue press on :)
My new team looks fun and I'm looking forward to be part of them!
Positive vibes everybody! InshaAllah!
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